How many times do you find yourself walking down the street and someone will comment on your bump or your baby?

It’s lovely they are interested in the baby, don’t get me wrong…

But how many times does someone ask about YOU? I mean ACTUALLY ask…

It’s almost as though we stop being important, isn’t it?

Well, my friend, I’m here to say; I THINK YOU MATTER more than you think you do… and here’s why…

Firstly, having a baby - the whole growing them, having them, nurturing them, caring for them, entertaining them, so on and so on - is a BIG thing. For some reason, we think we can grow a whole new human being while carrying on as though nothing has changed, and then we think we can pop them out and then hop back up and be well and ready to go again as if nothing has changed.

I think we forget to acknowledge often; quite how HUGE it is having a baby is.

So today, I want to talk about YOU.

Because, you know, being a new mum IS a massive change for us all. Caring for ourselves often goes out of the window. I know it did for me.

When I was pregnant, it was all about proving I COULD do it all, I COULD work right up until my due date, I COULD carry on as if nothing had changed, I COULD get up early, do a full day’s work, and go to bed late…

Of course, I was shattered the whole time!

Then the baby came…

I felt guilty about so many things once I had a baby. 

Odd things, like, leaving her to go to the gym was wrong. Or taking 5 minutes out for me to do something just for me was selfish. I stopped playing my flute (I’d been playing from the age of 11 and I was 32 by the time I had my daughter!). I stopped because it might have woken her up (it wouldn’t have done; she would have got used to it). I stopped going to the gym; I felt that if she woke up, I should be there, not my husband, so I was shattered… I stopped seeing friends without babies because… well, I don’t know why, but I did… When I look back, there were a whole lot of things I stopped for a whole lot of reasons.


BUT, if only I had carried them on, and shared the baby a bit more with my husband, I am SURE I would have been a better mum.

You see, a mum who has some time out is a happier person. A happier person can be a better, calmer, more engaged mum when she IS there…

So I am telling you today, get some time out just for you… it WILL help your baby reach their full potential because when you are rested, when you have time out just to be you, not being mum, you are more connected, more present, more focused and happier to be with your baby and therefore you can do more for them and with them, more effectively.

Another thing that escaped me for years was seeing the successes both the baby and I were having each day… IF ONLY I had worked this one out sooner! Finding the successes each day, makes ALL the difference to you, to your baby, to who you are as a person… finding the wins makes you realise that you ARE doing a great job even on the days that you don’t think you are!

Finding those wins can be tough. The Oliiki app gives you simple things to do each day, right from conception through until your baby’s 2 years old. It’s in the simple things that we find the biggest wins! Through our daily activities, we help you build your baby a strong brain, spark their adventures in learning and build your parenting confidence one play activity at a time. Download the app today and start finding those quick wins.