4 Simple Tips to Combat Overwhelm with a Baby or Toddler!

How can something so tiny as a new baby or toddler cause so much stress and overwhelm? As one mum said; “Everyone warns you what hard work it is but the reality hits in ways that just aren’t expected. No matter how wanted a baby is, sometimes you find yourself questioning why you even had them.” If this is you, you are NOT alone! The overwhelm can be real, it doesn’t last, it does get better just like when you have a new job and you wonder how you are ever going to work out how to do it you WILL work this out! But in those moments of overwhelm, it’s real!

Simple ways to combat overwhelm with a toddler or baby

No one has all the answers, but some tiny tweaks to the day can make ALL the difference. So this is my gift for you, some tiny life hacks I learned along the way to help you feel better and hopefully prevent YOU from having horrible out-of-control moments!

Tip number 1: Make the evening meal in the morning

Make the evening meal first thing in the morning. If you’ve got a slow cooker, fall in love with it and shove everything into that! If not, set the oven low and make casseroles or stews or one-pots that can be cooked slow and low. That fills your house with lovely smells as it cooks and will be a lovely surprise when you’re tired at the end of the day! Do you do this already? What’s your favourite recipe to put in your one pot? Let me know This is my current favourite.

 

Tip number 2: Plan your day into 4 hour blocks

Babies (and toddlers) tend to run on a four-hour schedule - ish. It can be really helpful to think about the day in 4-hour blocks and plan your day around them. In a single four-hour period, they will eat, sleep and play. How much they do of each one and how long they take to do it depends on their age. (But remember to be flexible with this timing!)

In the beginning, it’s mostly sleeping and feeding with a tiny bit of play, but over time, this swaps and it becomes mostly play, eating, and possibly a tiny bit of sleeping (or downtime). When you look at the day like this, you can have some structure in what seems a chaotic time.

sleeping baby

I found working backwards from bedtime gave me something to work towards AND it gave me a baby (and toddler) who went to bed at a sensible time, leaving me to eat that lovely one-pot waiting for me in the oven with my husband! And that is a massive win-win I say! 

 

Tip number 3: Plan baby play times right from the start.

You can also plan those playtimes as well which will really help you feel that you’ve got some proper structure into the day. So I suggest that you group toys (and things from around the house that become toys) into baskets or containers, so you can easily grab a different one to mix it up a bit throughout the day. I would make the first activity of the day one that you’ve done before that you don’t need to think about or prepare such as tummy time for your tiny ones, or playing with bricks or toys with your toddler. (Or perhaps use an activity from your Oliiki library of favourites). Set this up in the kitchen so that you're able to make the evening meal as they play and still interact and chat with your child. 

Make the second play session (the one around lunchtime) an outside time.

You could have a walk or go to the park, whatever seems good, but get outside whatever the weather! This will help you and your little one sleep better for having exercise and fresh air. And it will lift your spirits, give your child different stimulation and a different environment to explore and learn from. 

Reach for help as you get tired towards the end of the day

For the third activity of the day, use the Oliiki app as a prompt for when you’re getting tired as then it saves you thinking, and you’ll know that you ARE giving your child a brilliant, simple-to-execute activity that will help them grow and develop, and you won’t even have to have thought about it!

Tip number 4: Do Something for you

Find some time for you! The research is showing us that we don't do this BUT we also know that it's super important for your baby's life outcomes, so don't put this one on the backburner! Rather, pop a date in the diary with yourself and give yourself time to exercise, meditate, read a book, chat to a friend, go for a walk; do anything that directly looks after you! Do it while the baby is sleeping or even better, do it while someone else looks after the baby! It doesn’t have to be anything fancy, A friend of mine booked a babysitter and went rollerskating with her husband… it’s basically time to remember who you are!

Finally as a bonus tip: It’s all about the tiny wins

Find the tiny wins, all day, every day! Like I always say, your tiny wins build to big wins! When we find the tiny wins, we get a boost; that boost helps us feel fabulous, and when we feel fabulous then we can help our children feel fabulous, which in turn helps them reach their full potential and be as clever as they can be!

You may already have the Oliiki app, but if you don’t, you might find it useful to help you in those tired moments. It's a bank of simple, age-appropriate activities to do with your baby each day that are easy to do around the home. You'll find though the activities may be simple, the learning they are providing your baby with is not! And we've made sure that we've included a whole heap of information for you as well so that as your baby is playing and learning, you are learning too, which in turn will help you feel fabulous! So if you haven't found the Oliiki app yet, download it and take advantage of our 7-day free trial! 

What tips would you share with others to help combat the overwhelm and that feeling of being out of control with your baby?

Clare Stead

Clare Stead is a primary school teacher, education researcher, eLearning specialist & mum of 3 now bigger children.  Clare built the Oliiki app to help parents and parents-to-be spark their baby’s adventures in learning and build their parenting confidence one play activity at a time. She is passionate about supporting parents, nurseries and HR departments to help parents and parents-to-be thrive.

https://www.oliikiapp.com
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